“Pardon my Broca” should become a thing, since it’s a common side effect of CPTSD. What is this Broca, you may ask? Well first, its official name is Broca’s Area. It’s a part of our brain that acts as our communication center, specifically, how we send and receive information. It ensures that our conversations flow smoothly and that we can follow our boss’s instructions.
However, when our Broca’s Area disconnects, we experience what’s called mild to moderate aphasia. This is due to the location of Broca’s Area. First, it’s in the top portion of our brain, known as the prefrontal cortex. The prefrontal cortex is concerned with our executive functioning, planning and of course, our social awareness. Broca’s Area also happens to be in the left side of the brain, which we know as the logical side. Put it together, Broca’s Area gives us our words in social settings while helping us process the information we receive. When it disconnects, we have sensory and images but no words.
Signs of Broca’s Area Disconnecting
- Verbal: Is there any moment more awkward than having a good conversation and then suddenly, without warning, you’ve lost your next word? You haven’t forgotten what you were saying, your words have simply been disabled. Or how about explaining a topic you’re familiar with? You know what you’re talking about because you know the subject. Then aphasia strikes.
- Auditory: When given instructions and the words are clear, they’re simply not getting through somehow. How humiliating it is when we must ask them to repeat themselves several times!
- Reading: You understand the words you’re reading, but the sentences and paragraphs aren’t digesting, no matter how many times you reread it. It’s a sure sign of mental paralysis, which is a byproduct of Broca’s Area disconnecting. Unless, of course, you’re reading the work of a poor writer, in which case, it isn’t your brain’s fault at all.
- Writing: This is first cousin to “writer’s block”. You know what what you want to say in your next paragraph. The problem is, one of two opposite extremes happen. A major traffic jam of words swoop in at once, clogging your ability to find that one word you need. Or, you’ve suddenly lost the very words you intended to use in your next paragraph. It feels so close, like it’s on the tip of your tongue, but the harder you try, the more those words elude you.
Pardon My Broca, But This is How it Developed
Problems with Broca’s Area disconnecting can be traced to a moment in time that was an extreme shock to one’s foundation. Not knowing what to do with the new information, and unable to process it fully, the unresolved information branches out over time in a ripple effect. Most people can pinpoint the very day they experienced their Broca’s Area disconnecting for the first time:
One daughter of a borderline mother had been taught that good people go to heaven when they die. Then, at age seven, shortly after her uncle died, she tried to comfort her mother by reminding her that at least he was in heaven now. Her mother retaliated with a scream: “There is no God!” This shocked her core beliefs, while her mother’s verbal abuse intimidated her from asking questions. This prevented her from making sense of this new information.
Another witnessed her sociopathic mother violently attack her grandmother at age six. She approached her enabler (Trauma Glossary 1) father for help, but no sound came out. Her mouth opened and shut several times like a fish. Insult to injury, her enabler father made fun of her for “looking like a fish”.
Age eleven, my teacher spent the entire recess bawling me out in front of the very girls who were picking on me. Her encouragement of my group shaming had me in utter shock at my apparent badness. I was so irretrievably bad, I couldn’t even find my way to being right. I recall being at a loss of words. My teacher asked me a pointed question but in that moment, the sensation of sudden brain tightness, like every thought I ever had clogged up into a traffic jam. In my head, I saw a thick blob of smoke, intermingled with random garbage.
What do these incidents have in common?
All are psychological shocks that challenged old beliefs. Without hope of a resolution for this new information, the confusion of the event itself becomes the anomaly drop off point for other confusing events. Thereby branching out over time into its ripple effect. It’s how we arrive in adulthood when seemingly mundane communication can trigger this aphasia.
There are tools for skill building our Broca’s Area in Master Toolbox 2. Over time, we can strengthen it and lower the aphasia rate so that it happens less often. However, the drawback to any skill builder is, we need something that will help us work through it in our present day.
Troubleshooting in the Now
As embarrassing and frustrating as those moments can be when our Broca’s Area disconnects, remember that 1) it’s temporary and 2) it’s also harmless. Here is a list of things we can do to recover ourselves in those awkward moments.
Simply say “Pardon my Broca”
It’s important to remember that you have not lost all your words, you have simply lost them for the current topic at hand. Pardon my Broca is a great starting point for recovery. It’s slightly amusing, so the potential is there to disarm the bafflement or frustration in the other person.
It’s also a word that not many people have heard of but an easy enough term that can be parroted back right away. (Thank goodness! Imagine trying to say Pardon my dorsolateral prefrontal cortex, AKA, the brain’s timekeeper, by comparison.) So, there’s added potential that you can recover by piquing their curiosity. If that happens, you can explain how Broca’s Area works, or just show them this article. (There is also a condensed explanation of Broca’s Area in Trauma Glossary 3, if pressed for time.) Truth be told, more awareness should be raised on this often-overlooked problem.
Calm down and let go of the shame.
I know, this is easier said than done. So many of our CPTSD problems are directed by stress and toxic shame (Trauma Glossary 2). Remember, the original cause of Broca’s Area disconnecting was in response to stress. Therefore, the disconnection feeds off stress, which will only ensure it stays that way longer.
After you say Pardon my Broca, give yourself a moment’s pause. In that moment, remind yourself that what’s going on is not a reflection of low intelligence. It’s a side effect of CPTSD. The disconnection is only temporary.
Allow the subject to shift into a new discussion
Do not rush its retrieval of words. It will reconnect in its own time by simply talking about other subjects for a while. Giving the other person an opportunity to talk about something that interests them not only shows consideration, but it also takes the pressure off you to fill in that awkward gap. Give the new topic your full attention. Distraction is key to retrieving your words.
Pardon my Broca for its most inappropriate timing!
As its disconnection occurs at the most inconvenient times, so does its reconnection. It tends to come at us suddenly, that “Oh yes!” feeling once those words return. It brings with it the urge to push it out in a rush as a means of rescuing our dead narrative. However, it might not be the most appropriate moment to share, especially if it means interrupting the other person. Being considerate is good manners. After all Broca’s Area cut off your speech; don’t allow its reconnection to cut off the other person.
Additional Troubleshooting Tips
So far, we’ve discussed how to recover ourselves while verbally processing. What about the other processing styles? Before we delve into that, let’s see what’s going on during a disconnection by using the Branches of Healing from last week.
What’s in yellow represents how we can further work with our Broca’s Area to bring it back online. What’s in red represents the problem area of our brain when Broca’s Area disconnects. Note the four branches of processing: verbal, written, visual and auditory. To be fair, the “visual” component of Broca’s disconnection is primarily concerned with reading comprehension. Remember, Broca’s Area is concerned with left-brained stuff. That’s why its right-brained counterpart, creativity can help us retrieve our words. Where cognitions are concerned, you will see one more reason why I keep preaching about the value of having a cognition sheet on hand.
Keyword Listing
This a great one all around. Not only will it help you develop your skills over time but it’s also great for troubleshooting in the now. It’s condensing all of the key points into a single glance. This single glance method should never be understated. It’s taking us outside the box of written processing by giving us a word visual.
Auditory: Those awkward moments that call for action, but the words aren’t sinking in; say, for example, your boss is giving you a list of instructions. You can say, “Pardon my Broca”, whip out your phone or notepad and jot down step one, the keywords; step two, keywords, and so on. This gives you the opportunity to switch from auditory to visual processing. You’re seeing the instructions as opposed to hearing them, which can better help you understand what needs to be done.
Written: Keyword listing is also great for the written word, both sending and receiving. When faced with that proverbial brick wall, and words have failed you, start a list of keywords. What is it you want to say? The more keywords you list, the greater your chances are of finding your sentence structure. I use this trick, myself, in every article.
Reading: When reading the same paragraph and it isn’t sinking in, the first thing you should do is ask if you’ve been pushing yourself for too long. It could mean your executive levels have dropped and you just need a break. (This is a great mindfulness tool for managing our executive functioning levels.) However, if this is not the case, simply take the keywords from that material and review only the keywords. Say them out loud and try writing them down. See if this switch-up helps you.
Pardon My Broca, We’re Going Creative
When the left side of our brain fails us, go right! When we’re in a Pardon my Broca moment, what we lack in words, we’re making up for in sensory and images. We can use that to our advantage by getting creative.
Art is an excellent means of finding our words. It’s creating a visual scene out of those images, giving us something to look at, and by proxy, something to talk about. Credit is due to a highly artistic member of my group for teaching me this one. His Broca’s Area disconnected when his narcissistic father verbally abused him. He had no words, so he turned to art as a means of processing it. Then he shared his artwork and in so doing, talked about the significance of the images he used to represent his thoughts and feelings.
Music has been said to give our feelings a voice. It has the power of filling us with a sense of nostalgia, purpose, or even grief. In other words, we can use music for expressing the sensory aspect of a Pardon my Broca moment.
Using the Cognition Sheet as Review Prompts
The cognition sheet is like having a cheat sheet for discovering our thoughts and beliefs. Just as our emotions are typically layered with more than one feeling in any given time, so are our (cognitions) thoughts and beliefs. We simply don’t have words for everything that’s going on behind our communication. When we experience our Broca’s Area disconnecting, it’s being triggered by one of those hidden thoughts and beliefs. So when we use the cognition sheet, we are bringing those thoughts to light so that we can review and understand. Click here for your own cognition sheet.
- When you’re alone and in a calm headspace after experiencing a disconnection, start by asking yourself the most important question:
- What was it I was trying to say (sending) or understand (receiving) just before the disconnection?
- Check your cognition sheet: Was there anything in the negative column that triggered the disconnection?
- If so, when was the earliest memory you have of experiencing this negative thought?
- Now go to the positive column and find something to challenge that negative belief. Remember, it does not have to be straight across from your negative cognition/s. Just find something that you can use to counteract the negative.
- Now experience sharing your lost words with the empty room. You can either say them out loud or write it out. The choice is yours. The point is the active experience of reclaiming your lost narrative.
- Take one more look at the positive cognition you’ve chosen and give yourself one minute of mindfulness as you allow that cognition to digest somewhat.