Welcome to my CPTSD healing tools shop — a growing collection of practical workbooks, journals, focused tools, and Trauma Matrix Guidance.
The Trauma Matrix is big. Your starting point doesn’t have to be.
You don’t have to figure out the whole shop at once. Start wherever makes the most sense for you right now — work with me directly, follow the complete Level 1 curriculum, or choose one smaller tool for the pattern that’s giving you the most trouble.
👉 Jump to the section that fits what you need right now:
Level 1 Foundation Curriculum — complete physical + digital curriculum
Emotional Understanding + Agency Repair — Escape the Trauma Matrix books + individual tools
Identity Repair + Evidence — 7-day → 30-day → 90-day journaling system
Flashback System — recognize + stabilize emotional flashbacks
Body Literacy / Science Hacks — gut-brain patterns, sleep clues, and science-based supports
Quick Relief Tools — people-pleasing, overthinking, emotional spirals, closure wounds, and breaking trauma bonds
Memoir + Companion — healing through story + reflection
Guidance With Jaena — Start with 30 minutes. Continued 60- and 90-minute guidance is available if you want more time together.
Want Guidance With Me?
You do not need to figure out exactly where you are in the Trauma Matrix before booking with me, and you do not need to buy a tool or the full Level 1 curriculum first.
You might be stuck in a pattern you don’t understand, overwhelmed because everything seems connected, already working with one of my tools, or simply wanting the chance to talk with me one-on-one about what you’re going through.
Bring me what’s going on. We’ll slow it down, give language to what’s happening, and figure out a workable place to begin.
Start with 30 minutes — $30.
Longer 60- and 90-minute sessions will be available if you want more time and continued support.
Escape the Trauma Matrix — Level 1 Full Foundation Curriculum
Emotional Understanding → Agency Repair → Identity Evidence
What began as separate tools has grown into a connected Level 1 curriculum for understanding what keeps you stuck, rebuilding your ability to move forward, and strengthening your identity as you gather new evidence over time.
The progression moves through three stages: Emotional Resiliency helps you understand what your emotional systems are communicating; Escape the Trauma Matrix Level 1 helps you map fear, reward, effort, and the survival patterns that narrow your options; and The Complete Identity Repair Journey carries that work forward through structured journaling, reflection, and lived evidence that strengthens self-trust over time. Together, the three books create the full Level 1 Foundation.
Level 1 is where clarity starts turning into action: first understanding what is happening, then rebuilding agency, then gathering new evidence about who you are and what is possible.
You can move through the complete curriculum as a physical 3-book set, choose the digital pathway, or explore the next two sections if you want to start with one part of Level 1 or stay in a specific lane.
Complete Level 1 Foundation — Physical 3-Book Set
Purchased separately through Lulu, the three books total $136.97 before shipping. The complete set is $99, saving you about 28% on the books themselves. I personally process each bundle through Lulu so I can offer the physical curriculum at this lower combined price.
International shipping is available to many countries. Full print-on-demand, shipping, and international-order details are provided on Payhip.
Prefer Digital?
The full Level 1 curriculum is also available digitally for $88.99 total — the same complete progression, just in PDF format with immediate access and no shipping.
The digital pathway is split into two purchases so you don’t get hit with five separate PDFs all at once:
- Digital Bundle 1 — $39.99: Emotional Resiliency + Escape the Trauma Matrix Level 1
- Digital Bundle 2 — $49: Complete Identity Repair Journey PDF Trio
Nothing is missing from the curriculum. You still get the full Level 1 progression: Emotional Understanding → Agency Repair → Identity Evidence.
Bought separately, all five digital pieces would total $112.98. The two-bundle pathway brings the full digital curriculum down to $88.99, saving $23.99.
Digital is a good fit if you want to start immediately, avoid shipping costs, print only the pages you want to work with, or keep the curriculum available on your phone, tablet, or computer. You still get the full Level 1 curriculum — just organized into two cleaner digital packages, with bundle savings built into each one.
Level 1: Emotional Understanding + Agency Repair
Prefer to build it piece by piece? Explore the books and individual tools in these two foundation lanes.
These are the first two stages of the full Level 1 Foundation. Emotional Resiliency helps you understand what your emotional systems are communicating. Escape the Trauma Matrix Level 1 then works with the fear, reward, effort, and survival predictions that can make forward movement feel dangerous or pointless.
If you’re not ready for the complete three-book curriculum, you can start with either book or choose the individual PDF tools below to focus on one pattern at a time.
Available in digital and printed editions.
Available in digital and printed editions.
Wait, do I need the workbook and all five of these?
No.
The five smaller tools below are already included inside Escape the Trauma Matrix Level 1 as part of the full Agency Repair progression.
They’re also available separately as alternate entry points if you want to:
- start with one specific struggle
- spend less up front
- work on one area before taking on the full workbook
Level 1: Identity Repair + Evidence
The third foundation lane — build self-trust through the evidence of your own life.
This is the third stage of the complete Level 1 Foundation — and it can also be used as its own structured journaling system if identity repair is the lane you need most right now.
The system begins with seven days of emotional awareness, expands into 30 days of Recent Evidence, and then moves into deeper reflection and integration through Reflections ×3. Instead of asking you to simply think differently about yourself, the journal helps you collect lived evidence over time so your identity has something real to build on.
1. Start here: Daily Check-In (7 Days):
Using the Emotion Wheel and Cognition Sheet, you track your emotional states, unmet needs, and trauma-engineered beliefs — then use the Weekly Reflection to begin seeing your nervous system and identity healing in real time.
You don’t need to do everything at once. Start with daily awareness, then build from there.
2. Next: Recent Evidence (30 Days):
Instead of simply noticing patterns, you begin documenting proof — strengthening self-trust, challenging trauma-distorted identity, and reinforcing a more accurate sense of self.
Choose Digital or Print:
Includes a 30-day cycle-down month, an opening walkthrough, and a graduation video.
Because this is a 171-page integrated journal, the bound edition is recommended for the full physical experience. The digital edition is best suited for tablet annotation, professional printing, or people who intentionally prefer digital journaling.
The Emotional Flashback System
Recognize → Stabilize → Master
I built these tools during my own healing when emotional flashbacks were overwhelming and I needed a practical way to interrupt them without retraumatizing my nervous system.
If flashbacks feel intense, you don’t have to solve everything at once. The tools below follow a simple progression: first recognize what’s happening, then stabilize your nervous system, and eventually move toward mastering your response.
1️⃣Start here: Am I Having an Emotional Flashback?
(Recognize what’s happening first)
Once you know what’s happening, the next step is helping your body come back to safety.
2️⃣ Flashback Stabilization Toolkit
Body · Vision · Sound method
This guide introduces three creative pathways for interrupting emotional flashbacks:
• Body — regulating survival energy through posture and movement
• Vision — orienting attention back to the present moment
• Sound — using music and guided imagery to reshape the emotional narrative
Together, these tools help you build your own flashback stabilization toolkit.
New! Get both together:
3️⃣ Flashback Mastery System (coming next)
Become Flashback-Free Using the Branches of Healing System + Parts Work)
Body Literacy / Science Hacks
This section is for practical, science-based tools that help you notice body patterns, track nervous system clues, and use targeted supports when symptoms are hard to explain. These tools are especially helpful when stress, sleep, digestion, inflammation, cravings, or body-based patterns start affecting your healing work.
Gut-Brain Detective Tool
Track symptoms. Spot suspects. Support your body. Improve doctor conversations.
Coming next: Nightmare Hacks + Neuroplasticity Training
Nervous system tools for sleep disruption, trauma-pattern interruption, and practical neuroplasticity training.
🛠 Quick Relief Tools: The Nuts & Bolts Section
These tools match the most common patterns survivors experience when something feels off but hard to explain. If you want to understand these patterns more deeply or choose a tool based on what you’re experiencing, start here. Because sometimes you don’t need a full system — you just need something that helps right now.
Why won’t my mind stop replaying this?
This tool teaches a simple method for interrupting rumination loops and helping your brain release the memory instead of replaying it.
Includes a step-by-step exercise to reduce emotional intensity and regain control of your thoughts.
Why do I say yes even when I don’t want to?
This tool helps you:
-pause before automatically saying yes
-recognize the thoughts driving the urge
-hold your position through guilt and shame
-stay grounded without going back to fix it
Use it when you feel pressured, guilty, or stuck between what you want and what you think you “should” do.
Why do I miss my abuser so much?
How do I move on when I have no answers?
Best value if you’re dealing with both the pull and the lack of closure.
My Origin Story & Guided Companion
Sixth-Grade Scandal tells the story of my early trauma and the beginning of my healing journey. The companion journal was created for readers who resonate with that story and want guided space to process shame, betrayal, and the impact of “nice” abusers in authority. This section is for those who found me through the memoir — or who prefer to work through healing alongside narrative.
Starting here?
Recommended if you plan to join the live book club–workshop experience or want both the story and tools together.
Already read the memoir?
Want some guidance?
Start with a 30-minute Guidance Session.
Whether you’re choosing where to begin, working through Level 1, or using one of the individual tools in the shop, we can look at what’s coming up, where you’re getting stuck, and what may be most useful to focus on next.
30 minutes — $30
A focused starting point for one pattern, one tool, or figuring out your next step.
60 minutes — $60
More room to work through connected patterns, tools, or curriculum material together.
90 minutes — $90
For deeper guidance when several pieces are showing up at once or you want more time to work through what you’re uncovering.
We’ll walk through what’s happening and identify the best place for you to start.
Have a Question, Suggestion, or Experience to Share?
If you’ve used one of my tools, I’d love to hear what stood out or helped something click.
If you’re still trying to figure out where to begin, you’re also welcome to ask a question, tell me what pattern you’re trying to understand, or suggest a tool you wish existed. And if I already have an article or resource that may help you understand what’s going on, I’ll point you in that direction.
Your question or experience may also help someone else who’s standing here wondering where to begin.
As a survivor myself, the “highlight reel vs. the full movie” in The Survival Guide: Why You Still Want Them Back really stood out to me. Seeing the good and bad side by side helps bring the whole relationship back into focus. I wish I had this back then! 💜 Thank you, Jaena, for also donating your guide to DV survivors I work with.
Thank you, Lady Storm. 💜 I’m so grateful you shared this with the women you work with and gave me honest feedback from the people it was created for. I’m grateful for you, for the work you do, and for the way you’ve helped this tool reach people who needed it.