Setting boundaries and holding firm to them is the greatest challenge in our Complex-PTSD community. That’s because our self-abandonment programming tends to run our life. Until we do the healing work, of course. You see, behind our programming is toxic shame. And so, when attempting to assert, it tends to trigger a shame spiral, or …
Setting Boundaries and Holding Your Position Read More »
True story time. In 2014, I shared my dirty little secret with my therapist. “I don’t like helping people.” Yes, I – who considers myself a servant to my Complex-PTSD community and gets much satisfaction from doing so – once said and fully believed my own words. That’s how severe my self-abandonment programming once was. …
Self-Abandonment: People Pleasing versus Helping People Read More »
For most of us, we tend to be adults once we learn that we have Complex-PTSD. And as adults slammed with this diagnosis, we also tend to be busy handling our adult responsibilities. We have jobs, home maintenance, errands to run, and if we have kids, we have even more adult responsibilities. We certainly want …
How to Make Room in Your Life for Healing Your Trauma Read More »
In our Complex-PTSD community, we tend to get excited when we find the right tools. Our first instinct is to share what works with everyone else. It’s certainly well-meaning. We just want to save others the time and trouble it took us to find it. But we forget the time and trouble was what led …
How to Find the Right Tools For Your Unique Needs Read More »
When processing our trauma, there are three things we must practice. Mindfulness, Grounding, and building and maintaining our Window of Tolerance. Mindfulness means being present and aware of the moment. Grounding helps us feel fully present inside our bodies by using our five senses. So, put it together, it’s presence of both mind and body. …
Mindfulness, Grounding, and the Window of Tolerance Read More »
To understand our goals, we must first understand the major problems we tend to have as survivors of childhood trauma. Have you ever come across the term, interpersonal trauma? You can also think of it as an attachment trauma. When we are abused, abandoned, neglected, or betrayed by someone who is supposed to care for …
Interpersonal Trauma is the No Closure Wound Read More »
So, you got your “starter pack” from last week’s article and you’re ready to navigate the healing journey? Well, grab your compass because healing complex trauma is never straight and narrow. What sort of compass, you may ask, because surely we aren’t going on a literal hike or something? And you’re right. We are embarking …
How Do I Navigate My Healing Journey? Read More »
One night on Instagram, a beautiful soul from my Complex-PTSD community asked, How do I heal from this? It was a humbling moment because the answer can’t be summed up in a single comment. It was also a reminder that I asked the same question when I began my healing journey. We all ask this …
How Do I Heal My Trauma? The Most Loaded Question We All Ask Read More »
Death of a loved one, a relationship ending, or loss of a job are life-changing events that can be devastating. When grieving a major loss, we tend to feel more than just sad. We may also feel fear, anger, shame, guilt, abandonment, or we may even get defensive. But in times like these, there is …
Grieving a Major Loss: An IFS Heal-Along Interview Read More »
Last week’s heal-along was my example of how to heal our parts when access to the Exile is denied. This one is my IFS work on freeing one of my Exiles. And so, it’s a companion piece to our third article in this IFS series, which is on healing the Exile (here). Interestingly enough, the …
My IFS Work: A Heal-Along with Jaena Read More »
